The Travel Dispatch

Myth-Busting In The Lone Star State

This post was born 08 Oct, 2014 22 Comments
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Due to several factors that I’ll bore you with in a future post, I recently had to take a month long hiatus from my blog (insert bucket of tears emoji here). So much happened during that time that I now feel like that eager, red-faced jeopardy contestant that’s about to have an aneurysm trying to click the button in time to spit out the answer first. Seriously, I’m bursting. I must have bounced between writing 10 different posts this past weekend yet was unable to concentrate and finish one all the way through (ADHD at its finest).

Lucky for me, there are some experiences that simply don’t translate into words so I have something to put on the proverbial table. So let’s revert back to a simpler language commonly found in prehistoric cave dwellings (the pictograph – for those of you not smarter than a 5th grader) and delve into the Lone Star State.

Decoding Myths Of The Ancient Texans

1. All Texans ride horses: to work, school, the oil rig, and even the emergency room.

100% Fact – As evidenced by the below image taken from a Dallas Tack-room and Stable (In modern times, this is commonly referred to as a bathroom stall at a restaurant)…

Gotta love Dallas, Texas
Still-life with saddle, stool, and a yeehaw (c.2014), The Rustic, Dallas, TX      by Anonymous

2. All of Texas is made up of only deserts and tumbleweeds.

False. There are plenty of other things that make up Texas…

...Like Palm Trees...
…Like palm trees and Elvis…
...and the King. Shit, maybe its just a mirage.
…Oh F*** this must just be a mirage

3. Prairie dogs are prevalent throughout the state

Fact. They even have their own Canine Cantina – Mutts...

Dogs in the Lone Star State
Local watering hole for the cast of Paw and Order: Special Licking Unit
No Humans Allowed - Violates will be Pawsecuted
No Humans Allowed – Violators will be Pawsecuted

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. Texans are morbidly obese.

Results were inclusive. Statistically the obesity rate is at an all time high of 30.9% but I’ll let you come to your own conclusion based on the evidentiary support below…

Texas
Clearly the government is taking matters into their own hands to hide this growing problem
wow
On the other end of the spectrum, anorexia seems to be a growing concern. Who could possibly want to eat breakfast after opening the fridge in a Dallas apartment and seeing this? (Actually I did. Stacy – your not so subtle message didn’t work. Hangover food trumps a Victoria’s secret body every time)

5. Texans only eat BBQ and Tex-Mex.

And of course cactus…

Cactus in the Lone Star State
Slim pickins in all that desert

6. You see more Texan flags than American flags.

That may be true but American flags are staging a comeback…

American Flag in Texas
Also feel free to insert ‘redneck’ stereotype here

7. The food is way hotter (and I’m not talking about the temperature).

I can’t attest to the food but I think his face says it all about the drink…

Michelada in the Lone Star State
Michelada (mi·chel·a·da): noun, a prepared Mexican cerveza with lime juice and assorted sauces, spices, and peppers

8.  Everything is bigger in Texas.

Like beverages…

Coronas
…and none for Gretchen Weiners
Large beers in the Lone Star State
One obscenely large glass for you Glenn Coco…

And Mexican food portions…

Mexican food
Ok, so let’s face it – in actuality, this is ALL Mexican platters in the US

And of course, American football…

ATT&T stadium
You know what they say about Texan men – huge…

…..Egos

At ATT&T Stadium in the Lone Star State
It takes a huge ego to invest $1.3 billion to build the world’s coolest stadium (my brother and I thank you Mr. Jones)

Agree with the above? Or are a pissed off Texan and want to tell me off? Well, feel free to sound off in the comments below! (Ignore – this is booking test).

Why Suffer From FOMO When You Don’t Have To?

Taking on the classic “round-the-world” route, the next Travel Dispatch journey kicks off Nov 15 as I travel east to west, looping the globe over a period of 12 months with $25,000. Now’s your chance to get in on it from the very beginning!


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22 Comments on "Myth-Busting In The Lone Star State"

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Karen Warren
Guest

Great… now I know all those Texan stereotypes are true 🙂

Elena
Guest

Funny post, i really enjoyed reading it! I met quite a few Texans while travelling the world!

Dave Cole
Guest

Hilarious! I have yet to make it to Texas, but I’m looking forward to the fried cactus and t-shirt sales when I do. I saw a pre-mixed Modelom michelada the other day but passed, as I like mine fresh.

Kirsty
Guest

Interesting to read your “insiders” view of other people from your own nation. Us Brits just think Texans swagger around in cowboy hats and boots the whole time!

Adrian of Adrian's Travel Tales
Guest

Haha! It’s been a long time since I’ve been in Texas but I’d agree with most of these. Guess I have to get out there again to make sure. Hopefully I can find a nice tall cowboy to show me around!

Jameela Deen
Guest

Now that was fun… how many pissed off Texans came to shout at you? lol I’m not texan, not even close, and i loved your post

Laura
Guest

I’ve always wanted to go to Texas and now i want to go even more hahah! You go Glen Coco!! 😀

Sumit Surai
Guest

Fun post! And I would love to try the Michelada

Lyn - A Hole in my Shoe
Guest

Haha there are as many stereotypes about Texans as there are us Aussies. Great read

Brianna
Guest

Doesn’t everyone where cowboy boots and bolo ties?

Mindi @ 2foodtrippers
Guest

I’ve been to Texas twice, but only to Dallas. I need to get back to check out these myths for myself.

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